Mug Punter Morris looks back at a week, where Arsenal once again upset his weekend.

Over the course of time I have come to the conclusion that some people are born lucky. There are those that buy a lottery ticket once in a blue moon and pull in the prize money from a four week rollover draw. While some old Doris, who incidentally I like to call grandmother does her pension money week in week out on lucky dip tickets yet wins sod all.

People, who walk in front of a speeding car, do a double somersault into tuck position, land on their feet then do a celebratory jig away from the grim reaper. Then those that do an unsteady 2mph crawl on roller-skates into an open manhole, disguised as....well an open manhole (dad you dumb uncoordinated sod) breaking their leg in the resulting fall. And those that pick out horses because ''I just thought the horsies had funny names so I stuck on a £20 treble'', copping at accumulative odds of around the 1000/1 mark. Then there's me, checking the form, who's the jockey, who's the trainer, the owner, the going on the day, the weight, the selections optimum distance, is the price getting shorter or drifting in the market, along with numerous other possible pointers to a winner, only to realise after the stalls opening that I have actually backed a fat, boss eyed, 3 legged, rocking horse, that must have been profoundly impressed by Jacko's moonwalk as it's the only physical movement the bastard's capable of.

So it appears luck, well luck of the good variety at least, has not been a blessing held in at least 3 generations of my family.

Then there's football. A game in which a person of reasonable intelligence; through years of viewing should be able to make an educated guess as to the final result. Of course luck remains an element, but surely not to the extent of something like the horses or greyhound racing. I mean team (a) who all evidence suggests are better than team (b), should be winning said match. It's not like we've got them jumping hurdles with the irritation of vertically challenged men/children on their backs, whipping the shite out of them (Sometimes I wonder given such insight how I managed to avoid being a football manager mixing it up in the premiership). So herein lies my problem as has always been the case, the equation just doesn't measure up (undoubtedly because it's as ridiculously basic as it gets where research is concerned).

So somewhat disregarding above equation and looking down the fixture list for the weekend I only see two games that stand out. Some of you might say Chelsea at home Villa....you crazy. No you are not crazy; you made a winning selection when I saw a good chance of a draw. Some might say Man Utd away to Blackburn, when I again say ''good chance of a draw''. Some daredevils amongst you might even have the audacity to say Liverpool away to Man City. Yet again my thoughts are draw written all over it...written in Arabic...on a post it note...in a childish crayon scrawling....that no other sod saw but me.

I decide the best bets available to me are Portsmouth at home to Stoke, and Arsenal away to Sunderland. I'm pretty confident about both of these selections coming in, similar to the way a snake charmer might be if he fell in a crocodile pit. That's what chasing lost money does to you though, it convinces you to dismiss any doubts, replacing those doubts with a 7 foot 6 inch grinning moron, giving you a double thumbs, whilst belting out ''eye of the tiger'' at the top of his voice. Yeah...come on let's do it....I'm Rocky Balboa, I'm Rocky Balboa and I'm gonna kick the shite out of B.A Baracus/Mr .T/Clubber Lang. I'm not though am I? I'm a mug punter fantasist who has somehow equated placing a bet, to fighting my way out of the mean streets of Philadelphia. Given that these things run through my mind before I part with my hard earned money should be enough of an incentive to consider directing my investment to the well lined pocket of a head doctor and not Mr Willy Hill, but the head doctor isn't throwing me 2/1 for my money so balls to him. Anyway Portsmouth and Arsenal wins. Simple enough, the team I have adjudicated to be better than their opposing team to win through the process of scoring more goals than the other team (amazingly a theory I did not apply for Chelsea, Man Utd, and Liverpool in their fixtures yet with Arsenal and Portsmouth I did).

A simple theory that Arsenal refuse to incorporate into their game plan, for the second Premiership fixture running!

After getting turned over last week by Hull, I could not confidently back them to beat Porto midweek - 4nil Arsenal. A result I took as personal smack upside the head, but with Sunderland in the not too distant future my thought became ''oh well I'll just collect my money a few days later''. Arsenal becoming my confident pick of the two due to the 6-0 hiding Portsmouth took from Man City not too long ago still being reasonably fresh in my memory. I expected Arsenal to get back on track, and I got done again, again. Stupid amounts of confidence placed in a team playing away from home, at not a fantastic price, which have grown a liking to screwing up my bets.

The fact that I made two selections, and only one of them won is reason enough to pack it in now, but my luck's bound to change soon enough. Luck, luck of the good variety that's been non-apparent in at least the last three generations of my family...oh no!