Disco, disco… Arsenal star’s excuse not the worst

Mesut Ozil doesn’t do much to help his case. Gunners fans have tried their hardest to stand up for their £42.5m man, but his anonymous performances, failure to live up to his vast price tag and lack of effort have made the task tough And now Ozil has gone and made things even more difficult, with reports from the Daily Mail stating that he was pictured in a Berlin nightclub just hours after ducking out of the London club’s weekend game against Newcastle.

The German was given permission to link up with his international squad early due to suffering from a cold, yet that didn’t keep him in with a Lemsip! In many lines of work people have pulled to odd sickie, but football isn’t just a normal job, however, Ozil is to alone when it comes to woeful excuses!

I fell, honest!

We all saw you bite him, Luis! This excuse was mental - "I lost my balance, making my body unstable and falling on top of my opponent, “At that moment I hit my face against the player, leaving a small bruise on my cheek and a strong pain in my teeth,”

50 shades of grey…

A 3-0 loss to an average Southampton team brought this amazing excuse from Fergie, who blamed their grey away kit - "The players don't like the grey strip. They find it difficult to pick each other out. We had to change the strip,"

Chef Wenger

Spurs blamed a poorly cooked lasagne for loss at the hands of West Ham on the final day of the 2005/06 Premier League season, which denied them a Champions League spot. Ten players went down with a stomach bug having eaten at the Marriott hotel in West India Quay the night before.

Thriller!

Fulham’s old owner Mohamed Al Fayed blamed the Cottagers’ relegation to the Championship in 2014 on the decision made by new owner Shahid Khan to remove a 'lucky' statue of pop sensation Michael Jackson from outside Craven Cottage. - "This statue was a charm and we removed the luck from the club and now we have to pay the price."

The Sirens of Selhurst Park

Okay, we’ll let them off! Palace fans claimed that when their side were in the Championship players were distracted by the cheerleader squad.

Grandma, we love you

"I decided at that stage that I must tell the truth and admit I had told lies, I realise now that it was a massive mistake to say my grandmothers had died and I deeply regret it. It was wrong and I sincerely apologise as I have caused a lot of problems for many people. I would like to apologise to my grandmothers and all my family. I have learnt a valuable lesson from this mess and hope those I have hurt will forgive me."

Stephen Ireland dodged international duty by claiming that his grandmother had died… journalists then discovered she had not, to which Ireland responded by saying it was his other nan… who was also alive! But what do you expect from a bloke who drives a car like this!