Oscar Pye-Jeary @oscar-pye-jeary ?

If the yearly panto season of novelty charity matches have taught us anything, it’s that menfolk can never let go of the idea they could be professional footballers, no matter how successful they’ve been in other walks of life. There seem to be a never-ending slew of politicians, musicians, disgraced television presenters and former Eastenders actors [...]

1. Spain are boring - Despite being told for years that our diminutive Iberian cousins and their cohesive brand of tap dancing show football were the divine epitome of the beautiful game, Spain are now officially, actually boring. Maverickly opting to play without strikers, lumbering centre halves or players willing to tackle with their face, La Furia Roja now [...]

Still keeping the British end up abroad through a combination of steely will power and the kind of boundless enthusiasm one can only gain by ingesting huge quantities of Mike Tyson’s Black Energy, our intrepid FanCast reporter Oscar Pye-Jeary completes his whistle stop, stop, go, stop, stop, go, flight, bus, stop, go tour of the group [...]

Still stationed deep behind enemy lines, manfully tolerating the constant barrage of stodgy food and inadequate air conditioning, courageous FanCast reporter Oscar Pye-Jeary continues to document his travels with Team England despite being forced to endure hours and hours of endless entertaining football, solely for your benefit. This week he bravely smuggled himself into the final [...]

Out in the deepest, darkest depths of the Crimea, fearless, intrepid FanCast reporter Oscar Pye-Jeary selflessly, tirelessly and with a dogma inspired hint of amateurism documents his exploits following the England team at Euro 2012, without a moment’s thought for his own safety, professionalism or ever diminishing sobriety. After slugging it valiantly through the searing, Mediterranean like heat of [...]

If cab drivers, tabloid newspapers, radio phone ins and Carlsberg adverts have taught me anything, it’s that the one thing an England captain needs to be, is passionate. In fact, if any of those things have taught me anything at all, it’s that all an England captain need be is passionate. Actual footballing ability is an [...]

As transfer deadline day approaches, withering yet more precious life fragments from our ultimately pointless existences, like a child whose pined all Christmas for that dream present only to find Santa has given it to that rich brat down the road and he’s been left to make do with a barely functioning second hand training bike on [...]

At least no times a year am I asked what I think the differences between football spectating in Europe and North America are, but when asked by a friend if I’d like to attend a Baseball game during a hastily arranged stay in New York last week, the idea tickled my fancy. “No” I thought, I’d rather [...]

And so we’re back. And after an eventful summer of rioting ruffians, dying divas and hack happy hacks it all boils down to one thing. Gary Neville has a big new pencil. Having spent the best part of my summer attempting to write a sitcom pilot about a deviously immoral tabloid editor, but finding a dead [...]

The 31 st of August. Just another day in the football calendar, albeit one without any actual football, but distinguished slightly by the ending of the time period allotted to register new players. Little more than a necessary logistical failsafe, to cross the i’s and dot the t’s and generally make sure all the cumbersome bureaucratic paper [...]

And so we’re back. And after an eventful summer of rioting ruffians, dying divas and hack happy hacks it all boils down to one thing. Gary Neville has a big new pencil. Having spent the best part of my summer attempting to write a sitcom pilot about a deviously immoral tabloid editor, but finding a dead [...]

One thing never goes out of fashion: Retro. This of course can mean absolutely anything that isn’t now, which is precisely why it never goes out of fashion. The new England kits, both suitably dapper and marvelously chic are certainly retro. The home one belongs in the Stanley Matthews era, where football shirts were essentially rugby [...]

Movies. Movies are great aren’t they? A wise man once said; “Men like films where lots of people die very quickly and women like films where one person dies very slowly” . Failing this of course, sports films can often do the trick for men in lieu of a decent body count per minute ratio. Except that is, [...]

If given enough time and purpose I could write a long and poisonous diatribe against the evils of Sky television. With it’s egregious presentation, farcical hyperbole and pre-Premier League amnesia it’s virtually short hand for all that is ill in the modern game. Why if I were a semi decent mid-table Premier League youngster I’d be [...]

And so there we sat, the footballing world, huddled inside on a still freshly enjoyable evening, lips pursed, bums squeaking, fingers poised with intent over the twittersphere, primed in anticipation and wet with giddiness at the prospect of watching the pinnacle of the beautiful game in all it’s glorious fruition. The two biggest sides, the two [...]

For the 15 th time in 12 weeks, both diminutive retro haired cartoon dormouse Lionel Messi and varnished pants mannequin Cristiano Ronaldo scored hat tricks in their respective La Liga matches. “That’s impossible” you may claim. And you may be technically right, but whatever the amount really is (It’s actually three) Ronaldo now has a quite ridiculous [...]