Now Gareth Bale has made the move to Spain, you would think talk of him would have died down.

The Welshman dominated the column inches during the summer, with the ‘will he – won’t he’ saga, which ultimately ended in a world record transfer to the Bernabeu.

But it is not a case of out of sight out of mind, as Bale is still the name on everyone’s lips, especially Real Madrid owner Florentino Perez.

He has barely been in Madrid a month, and Perez has already written a letter asking for a full refund, citing several reasons.

Firstly, the Welshman is ‘broken in several places, specifically the left thigh.’

Secondly, he ‘does not match the description in the brochure.’

And finally and perhaps most importantly, Bale ‘is not compatible with the CR7’.

Perez goes on to say how he has a history of buying faulty goods from England – Michael Owen and Jonathan Woodgate anyone?  And goes on to request a refund.

What he has clearly forgotten is that he is writing to Daniel Levy, perhaps the most shrewd and ruthless chairman in the Premier League. He’ll be lucky if he doesn’t end up another £85million out of pocket and with Andros Townsend as his new number 11 by trying to return him.



  • Ken
    2 years ago

    This is an old spoof that’s. Even around for nearly a month, try something new!

  • Annoyed with idiot author
    2 years ago

    Grow up you imbecile. Have you had an education. Try reading it and you’ll understand how stupid you now look. Do you seriously think Real Madrid send out letters that are not on headed notepaper for starters?

  • Shoot Me
    2 years ago

    This wasn’t funny a month ago.