OMFG Arsene Wenger has said he’s going to be busy in the transfer market!!!
I’m not surprised. Do you know how long it would take me to flog a dead horse outside the Millennium Stadium? Neither do I, and I’m not going to attempt such a fruitless act just to satisfy your curiosity…ok my curiosity. Unless anyone has a spare dead horse? Oh right, yeah. Wenger does. To quote The Omniscient One, he states:
‘There will be some movement of players who have played less and who need to play.’
And further more:
‘We had a few important ones, but this [summer] will certainly be a big one on all fronts.’
And as if there’s not enough dissension amongst over sensitive disciples of Arsenal Football Club right now, a good ol’ stirring of the transfer speculation cauldron is a sure-fire way to arouse the bellicose. More rabid than a colony of Peruvian vampire bats, cantankerous souls are foaming at the mouth, baying for the blood of the incriminated.
But many mistakes are made in haste.
Let us first consider how long it would take to flog Denilson, for example. A player generally viewed as below the standard required by many. The Brazilian 23-year-old signed for £3.4 million back in 2006 at the age of 18. Which means Arsenal have invested five years of training, education, and personal development into Denny. Not to mention what the club must have paid in wages – a young man, who was ever present in the 2008/09 season, with his best years ahead of him. Many of the myopic amongst you would hastily, in theory, gratefully accept a nominal sum and escort the player to the nearest airport whilst doing the fandango. Wenger on the other hand, will be searching for a fee which more closely resembles that held in his own mind.
So, while it may be difficult and time consuming enough to flog a dead horse outside the Millennium Stadium, imagine if I were trying to flog that dead horse for £10 million?
Now imagine having to flog ten dead horses! Team Dead Horsi are going to be massive money spinners, eh?
I’m resisting the urge to name them Team Dead Donki…Oops…
And while Wenger will be sending his team of young apprentices onto the high street to sell useless crap to the general public, step in Alan Sugar, the more important potential losses could slip under the radar.
Question marks hang over a number of first-team regulars who are more than capable of ending this repeated barrage of endless monotony from the media. This repeated barrage of endless monotony from the media. This repeated barrage of endless monotony from the media. This repeated barrage of endless monotony from the media by winning a major trophy.
It surely would be a massive oversight if the likes of Samir Nasri and Cesc Fabregas were to leave alongside Team Dead Donki. Replacing ordinary players is a task Wenger evidently excels at. The cycle of player registrations at Arsenal’s infamous, ‘you’re here because I can’t be asked with the defensive side of beautiful football’ position reads like a who’s who of who the hell are you kidding?
From Igor Stepanovs to Pascal Cygan and Mikael Silvestre to Sebastien Squillaci, the turnover is as incessant as it is vexatious. Finding someone capable of superseding a first-team regular, however, has proven to be a little more troublesome over the years. As Monseur Stubbornos Greatos patronisingly reminded us after our draw at Craven Cottage, we will not be spending £50 million on a player. Not that I’m suggesting we need to. Bacaray Sagna was a snip at £7 million. Eduardo was just £500k more, and I think we can all agree, was remarkable until the ill-fated trip to St. Andrews (no more trips to that place anymore! hahaha!).
There is no denying that the squad needs strengthening, and it will probably need a lot more after half our squad and probably one or two first-team regulars leave.
So to think that we could be in a better position in early August without spending large sums of money is a chastely chimera that nobody could possibly envisage, with the exception of one…
Read more of Gavin’s articles at Gunnersphere