Welcome to the brave (and slightly bigoted) new world of English Football. Brexit has taken a turn for the unprecedented and every foreign player and manager has been sent packing. Only the English, Scottish, Welsh and Irish remain.
Don’t worry, this isn’t a breaking news piece but have you ever wondered who would prevail if club’s could only field British nationals? This is what Tom Skinner intends to simulate using Football Manager.
To keep it as realistic as possible, every team has had a transfer embargo placed on them and reappointed the last British manager they had. West Ham – who are obviously as English as continental lager and curry anyway – welcome back Alan Curbishly.
In North London, Arsenal have rolled back 20 years to find a very confused looking Bruce Rioch and Spurs have stocked up on gilets for the return of everyone’s favourite quantity surveyor lookalike, Tim Sherwood. There are unpopular returns for Moyes and Hodgson and City and Chelsea have been rummaging around in the FA’s lost property bin for Stuart Pearce and Glenn Hoddle.
In real life, Burnley have more English players on their books than any other and Watford have the most diverse squad in the league so logic would suggest they’ll find themselves at opposite ends of the table come May. Ones to watch are Bournemouth and Southampton who already have a core of quality, British players in their starting 11s.
Watch the madness unfold in 90 seconds below…