‘Dog watching’ journo blames Man United ace for mix-up

A journalist was pictured searching for dogs on his laptop when Manchester United hosted Bayern Munich on Tuesday night.

Comments allo over social media were suggesting  he was too bored by the match so he decided to do something else instead. However, the journalist has come out to explain that everything is not as it seems

The Telegraph’s Chris Bascombe has admitted he was indeed the person looking at dogs at the game, but it wasn’t through boredom. The Daily Telegraph reporter has written a long and quite hilaruous explanation as to why he was look at dogs, and blames a Manchester United midfielder for the mishap…

The scene is Old Trafford and the task is to file the match ratings for the Manchester United v Bayern Munich fixture.

Those who watched the aforementioned game will acknowledge United midfielder Marouane Fellaini was, to put it mildly, not at his best. This would have to be acknowledged in the said rating. ”Fellaini. Not very good. 4.”

Of course, this would have been the easy observation. To the point, accurate but ever so slightly bland to the extent of appearing even less interested than the Belgian’s efforts to control the ball and win headers.

So, as is the want of those tasked with ratings, you try to paint a more colourful picture in the 35 words available. ”He looks like an out-of-control dog,” I thought. But what dog?

In the diligent pursuit of accuracy I used a well known search engine to check photographs of an Afghan hound. My instincts were right. Fellaini bore no resemblance. So then, what dog? Ah, there it is. A poodle. Fellaini, with that bushy head, resembled a poodle on steroids. An overgrown poodle. That’s it. That will do.

Right, he’s sorted. Now, how shall I describe Danny Welbeck?

Shortly after the game a colleague approaches.

“Have you been staring at dogs?”



“Well, I mean, er, well, I suppose I did yeah… why?”

“It’s on Twitter.”

“What? I accidentally tweeted a photo of a dog?”

“No. Here. Look.”

I was then directed to a ‘parody’ website which, utterly hilariously, had posted a photograph of a journalist looking at a picture of dogs while the game was going on, accompanied by a suggestion the reporter found it more interesting than the match.

“This,” I instantly established, “does not look good.”

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