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Five things we love to hate about Manchester United

Most of us treat our favourite football club like a loyal old dog. No matter how much it keeps us up at night or occasionally leaves us unexpected steaming piles of mess to clean up, it is always capable of bringing us unparalleled joy.

Such affection for one team leaves a whole lot of hate for the remaining 91 clubs in the football league. Whether wholehearted hatred or mild malevolence, everyone has something they despise about their rivals.

In a series titled ‘Five things we love to hate’, we’ve pointed our misanthropic finger at some of England’s top clubs so you don’t have to.

Stephen Fry once quipped: “There are three teams with swear words in their name; Arsenal, Scunthorpe and Manchester F***ing United.”

In the first instalment, we take an alternative look at the club that enjoys the truly unique phenomenon of worldwide adoration and distain in equal measure.

Look out for some truly moving performances from everyone’s most treasured thespian Wayne Rooney.

What do you dislike most about Man United? The fair-weather fans? Rooney? Jose? Let us know in the comment section below…